Sometimes you feel like some nuts

I don't really make it a secret that I'm on the dating sites and I've used them periodically through the years with somewhat fruitful results. Previously, my bouts with meatmarket.com led to me meeting someone with whom I wanted to spend more time. This go-round, however, is proving to be much different.

I'm not sure what happened between now and the last time, but it seems that men got either really creepy or really selfish. I have a feeling most women would say something like , "Got? They've always been that way.". Not true. I've gone out on dates with some genuinely nice guys, but there was no click, no chemistry. And not having any chemistry immediately puts the lady bits on lockdown. That guy is never gonna get the key, no matter how perfect he seems on paper. If he ain't got it on the first date, he's never gonna get it.

So, the way this whole online dating thing works is that you basically search for someone that looks attractive and then you read their profile, if they still seem like a good thing then you can either "wink" at them (like a feeler to see if they're interested) or you can just send them an e-mail. I try to respond to every wink and e-mail I get but, let's face it; that's never gonna happen. Instead, I'll write back to the ones I deem attractive and with a good personality (sometimes, yes, on looks alone...whatever, don't judge).

Recently I received a wink from a guy who was neither 50+ years old nor 500+ pounds. I thought he's cute, I'll just go ahead and send him an e-mail. So, of course I was super charming and layed out some really good lines. It just oozed awesome...in fact all of the e-mails that I send ooze awesome. I have a feeling though that some things people might want to send me would probably ooze something far more different. What I received back, after thoughtfully crafting an eloquent, poignant and clever message was one question:

Are you into submissive men?

Now, there were two things that went through my head at this point.
A of all: he's just a guy who doesn't have a lot of opinions and let's the woman take the lead on decisions
B of all: he wants me to crush his nuts with my snakeskin stilettos

What do you mean by submissive? was what I wrote back because now I needed to know if it was A or B.

There are two reasons the above response bothered me. The first was that I could be misconstrued as someone that would enjoy playing the role of dominatrix in the bedroom. I get the otherwise. Yeah, I tend to be an alpha female, but when I'm in a relationship I'd rather have a partner than a whipping boy. I can't stand when a man can't make up his mind about something as simple as where to go to dinner, let alone whether he wants me to beat him with the horsehair whip or the leather whip. I simply don't have time for that.

But the thing that bothered me the most was that he had the audacity to send me this e-mail and include a grammatical/spelling error. Who proclaims they're a masochist and then doesn't spell check that shit??